I had the thrilling opportunity to watch the World Cup Final at the Soweto Fan Park in South Africa on Monday. Yes, the vuvuzela howls are deafening, but I still cheered alongside 10,000 South Africans as Spain kicked in the winning goal against the Netherlands (my friend Robin from San Fransisco was rooting for the Netherlands — see photo).

It is not that I – or my South African hosts – are huge Spanish soccer fans. In fact, most of the South Africans I spoke with had little knowledge of the individual teams, but agreed that World Cup fever had swept their country. Everywhere you look, soccer images line the streets. From soda cans to billboards, you cannot escape FIFA’s domination.

Certainly, the World Cup has brought together a divided nation and given the rest of the globe a fresh lens through which to view what I am finding to be an inspiring country.

But one thing has struck me: This lens – and FIFA in particular — has filtered out and excluded (sometimes ridiculously so) the female athletic experience. This was an opportunity for all athletes to celebrate this sport. But we only saw half the picture.

Nowhere in the city do you see ads with little girls playing soccer and nowhere do you hear the voice of a female commentator. Does FIFA mean to suggest that the World Cup only inspires little boys? Are the sports networks telling us no women are qualified to provide commentary or reportage?

And in what would be a natural plug for it’s next major event, FIFA was stunningly silent about the fact that next year’s Women’s World Cup is in Germany. Disturbingly, the only fact my South African and American peers could recall about the Women’s World Cup when I asked them was “that one time that women took her shirt off.”

Do we need a woman in a sports bra – Brandi Chastain – to bring attention to women’s soccer? Without engaging yet another debate on sexy athletes, let’s instead pose the fair question: Is the World Cup truly a celebration of the beautiful game – or just the celebration of men who play it?

Rachael roots for Spain while her friend Robin (obviously) pulls for Netherlands

World Cup crowds on Monday night

Nasrin Arbabzadeh

By Sarah Odell and Lindsay Rico

Nasrin Arbabzadeh, the leader of the Afghan women’s sports delegation, has been actively working for years for the rights of Afghan women to complete in sports. In 2001, she traveled from city to city recruiting women to compete in the the Third Muslim Women Games. At the time, she told the Minneapolis Star-Tribune that she wore a burqa so as not to draw attention to her work. “My life would have been in danger if the Taliban had learned of my activities and my purpose,” she said.

During the opening ceremonies of those games, organizers staged a black out and many athletes wore black mourning clothing and carried candles as a sign of support for the 48 Afghan delegates. Their participation was a symbol of political resistance. “I’m competing here to denounce the Taliban’s uncivilized treatment of women in the name of Islam,” Salma Hosseini, tae kwan do silver medalist, announced at the time.

Last week, at the Fifth World Conference on Women & Sport in Sydney, Ababzadeh stood in a question and answer period, and sought insight into how to develop, support, and train female athletes in Afghanistan. “Does anybody know about the women in Afghanistan?” she asked. The hall was silent.

FGN spoke with Arbabzadeh about her work and the challenges for female athletes in her native country.

FGN: In Afghanistan, what kinds of sports do women compete in?

NA: They play football (Soccer), badminton, basketball, taekwondo, and volleyball. But it’s very hard for them. At first, their families are not happy and they make it difficult for the girls to play. But when these girls bring home medals and awards, then their parents are happy for them.

FGN: What are some of the challenges these girls and women experience?

NA: The difficulties don’t end with the family. Most of our athletes don’t have the right clothes, shoes, or food. And athletes who have become successful are often threatened. Sixty percent of people are happy with them, forty percent are not. People think they are bad girls because they have chosen to participate in athletics.

FGN:What is your role in women’s sports in Afganistan. Who has been important to your work?

NA: I am the first woman to start sports for girls in Afghanistan. I am so happy with Faezah Hashemi, the Iranian president of the Islamic Federation of Women Sport. She has helped lots of young women within the federation, regardless of what country they come from.

FGN: How did you first get girls involved in athletics?

NA: In 2001 I collected young girls who wanted to play sports brought them to the Muslim women games in Iran. The girls competed in volleyball, tae kwan doe, shooting, tennis, running, chess, and badminton. I paid for everything so my teams could go to this competition. The girls and their families were so happy, because in Afghanistan, there are no teams that allow women. But leaders in Afghanistan  did not like what I was doing and I received threats, so [after the games] I went back to Iran.

FGN: Who was behind the threats? Why were you threatened?

NA: The Olympic manager.  He did not have a lot of experience. He saw that I had experience and knowledge. I saw many things I wanted to change. I saw the disabled athletes had terrible equipment. I wanted to help them. I asked him why they did not have better equipment and he did not like that. He told my husband that if I had any more things to say about the Olympic management or problems, he would kill me.

Arbabzadeh now lives abroad, in Australia, and serves on the Women with Special Needs Committee for the Islamic Federation of Women Sport.

FGN's Rico & Odell talk with Arbabzadeh

News of Judge Sylvia Pressler’s death last week – at 75 at a family home in Sparta, NJ – drew a few paragraphs in the newspaper, but hardly attracted huge attention.

And yet, as spring training gets underway and kids prepare for Little League tryouts (now a winter affair), we should remember Pressler’s contribution — and not just her 1973 finding allowing Maria Pepe of the Hoboken Democrats to play Little League — but the way she framed the issue.

Pressler made clear the connection between sports – in this case, Little League Baseball – and political equality. “The institution of Little League is as American as the hot dog and apple pie,” she wrote in her findings. “There’s no reason that part of Americana should be withheld from girls.”

When the National Organization for Women filed a grievance on behalf of Pepe with the New Jersey Division on Civil Rights, the debate focused chiefly on concerns that girls would get hurt if they played baseball with boys – a notion that if you look at the size of many 9 and 10-year-old girls compared with boys, appears downright silly (note the size of the girl vs. the boys in the Times story photo below, published after Pressler’s findings and amid widespread debate).

In researching Playing with the Boys, N.O.W granted me access to their papers, including details of the 1973 proceedings and Pressler’s findings. During six days of testimony in the case, Little League officials tried every argument they could muster to bar girls from the game. One of the most amusing points came from Dr. Creighton J. Hale, physiologist and Little League VP, who argued that “the possibility of cosmetic injury is more ‘socially damaging’ for a girl than it is for a boy.” Another LL representative, Dr. Thomas Johnson, a San Diego psychiatrist, argued that forced integration of the sexes was bad for children’s mental development. “Boys like to be with boys and girls like to be with girls,” he said.

Give Pressler credit at a time when it was not easy to stand up to male tradition for insisting that integration of the sexes (and, yes, even in the male sport of baseball) mattered. “I have no doubt that there are many reputable psychologists who would agree with the ‘birds of a feather’ theory,” Pressler wrote. “But the extension of that is that whites like to be with whites, blacks like to be with blacks and Jews likes to be with Jews; and that whole theory is a contradiction to the laws of this state and this country.”

Further, she said, “the sooner little boys begin to realize that little girls are equal and that there will be many opportunities for a boy to be bested by a girl, the closer they will be to better mental health.”

Her ruling created an uproar. But it stood.

Imagine if someone who lacked her clarity of vision had decided the case? When I learned of her passing, I had one thought: Thank you, Sylvia Pressler.

The New York Times, April 2, 1974

By Emilie Liebhoff

I recently took my three-year-old daughter ice-skating for the first time.  I skated a few laps, did some quick crossovers, and pivoted back and forth.  She was amazed.  (I’m sure she thought, “What did you do with my mom?”)  Then, with knees bent and arms out, she tried. “Look Mommy, I’m doing it.  I’m doing it!”  It was heartwarming: She wanted to be like me.

This is an exciting Olympic year for me.  It’s the first time my daughter is old enough to really watch Olympic women’s ice hockey with me.  She’s seen men’s football.  She’s seen men’s golf.  And, she’s seen men’s baseball.  Now I get to show her my sport, and the strong, skilled, athletic women who play it.

Here are three reasons why I’m watching with my daughter:

1)    Encourage her to be a sports fan.  Not only do I want to show her that women play ice hockey, but I also want to encourage her to watch sports and to excited about the women playing them.  Men and boys follow sports — but not enough girls and women do. Watching the Olympics is Step One to develop the fan in our daughters.

2)    Show her female sports role models.  Growing up it was tough for me to be a sports fan: Sure, Wayne Gretzy was an amazing hockey player, but he was a guy.  That’s not the case now for our girls. There are incredible female athletes who our daughters can aspire to be like, and who can be positive influences in their lives. (This US team has 15-first-timers plus veteran Jenny Potter — mom! — and superstar Angela Ruggiero, the first female non-goalie to play men’s pro hockey).

3)    Teach her the game. When you are an educated observer, your daughter will notice!  She’ll appreciate and admire your ability to watch the game, root for your team, and know what’s going on. This also is a chance for you to help your daughter build her own sports knowledge.

I did play hockey in college, but that experience isn’t required to watch — and enjoy! — the games with your daughters. Here’s help:

– First, when watching don’t say, “Wow isn’t she pretty?”  Instead, use this opportunity to emphasize the skill and strength of the players.  “Look, Jane, isn’t it impressive the way she stickhandles the hockey puck?” Or, “See how fast she can skate!” Remind them of the finesse and skill required to keep possession of the puck, particularly because checking isn’t allowed, but body contact is.  Point out, that women can use their bodies to protect the puck.

– Show your daughter that you understand the sport. Mention some of the rules. One key rule is offsides: The easiest way to explain it is to always let the puck win a race between the player and the puck.  If the puck crosses the blue line into the offensive end, the puck must cross the line before the offensive player.  If the puck gets sent out of that end and crosses back over the blue line, then all offensive players must follow the puck out of the offensive end.  The puck always needs to win the race.   For more rules and information, click here.

– Make it a point to interact while watching the game.  Have your daughters notice, for example, that when there are only four players on one side of the ice it means that team must have a penalty.  Conversely, the other team must have a “power play.”  This is a good chance for the power play team to score because they have an extra player.  Sometimes, you will notice an exciting moment when a team will “pull the goalie” to put an extra offensive player on the ice.  This usually happens if a team is trying to tie up the game and there is a minute remaining.

– And, importantly, show your daughters that when women score, they celebrate.  (Girls sometimes feel they are being conceited if they celebrate).  Expressing happiness after a goal is OK and encouraged!

– Also point out that ice hockey is not about the individual, but is a team sport. Highlight the fact that there are five players on the ice and that they all pass the puck to each other to work toward scoring a goal.  They also work together to defend and protect their own goalie.

The Olympic games occur over an exciting two weeks.  Use the games as a chance to not only bond with your daughter, but to ignite her interest in becoming a sports fan.   You may be developing the next generation of female athletes. See  Olympic women’s ice hockey schedule here.

Emilie Liebhoff teaching her eldest daughter to skate

Emilie Liebhoff is former co-captain of the Dartmouth College women’s ice hockey team, mother of two daughters, founder of Moms as Mentors™ and the Director of Strategic Initiatives at the National Coalition of Girls’ Schools.

Documentary filmmaker Jenny Mackenzie’s film Kick Like a Girl conveys the empoweringand enlightening experience when a soccer team of 8 and 9-year-old girls plays in the boys division — quite successfully. After Mackenzie’s visit to Wellesley College last week, I spoke with three student athletes about why gender equity in sports is so crucial at a young age and how their own experiences shaped their views of sport and life. I spoke with senior Katie Martore (soccer and basketball), senior Loretta White (lax and soccer), and sophomore Olivia Hulme (swimming and diving).

FGN: Have you every played with or against boys in sports? What was it like?

KM: Yes—when I was little I played in a co-ed soccer league. I remember the boys on other teams would make fun of me because I was basically the only girl who wanted to play with the boys. They didn’t think I was a good soccer player because I was a girl, but I finally gained some respect when I tackled a boy and told him to never touch me again. When I was little, it seemed that once the boys realized I was a good player they stopped bothering me and treated me like all of their other teammates. It was less about being a girl and more about my skills and talent. Once I shattered the notion that girls are bad at sports, the boys respected my athletic ability.

LW: When I was in elementary school I was one of three girls who played in the local Little League. The boys were a little skeptical at first, but as soon as I showed them that I could turn a double play and hit line drives over the outfielders’ heads they viewed me as just another ball player rather than the token girl.

OH: The only time that I ever played with/against boys in sports was in indoor soccer in middle school. I think that it wasa great experience because the team dynamic and attitude was very different with a co-ed team than just an all girls team. I feel as though we were more competitive and aggressive in playing and the boys did not necessarily go any easier on the girls. When we would play games, everyone who was playing was an equal and we just enjoyed the game. It was a better experience because we played with and against the boys.

FGN: Do you think girls grow up believing that they can’t play certain sports — or play certain sports with boys — even when they are in grade school?

KM: Yes definitely—girls are not expected (or allowed really) to play football, baseball or any other sport with the boys. If you are a girl you join the girls’ league, plain and simple. When I was in grade school, I always wanted to play kickball but I realized that only the boys were supposed to play kickball and so I was stuck deciding everyday whether or not to play with the girls (doing boring stuff) or jump in with the boys (worrying about what my classmates would think of me). There wasn’t much room for a girl like me who liked playing sports and wanted to do everything the boys and the girls did.

FGN: We’ve been treated to hearing about girls who can play with boys — not just the Mighty Cheetahs, but last week bowler Kelly Kulick winning the men’s Pro Bowler’s Association major tournament. What meaning do stories like this hold for you?

Katie Martore

LW: Hearing such stories is inspiring from both an athletic and gender dynamic standpoint. It gives me hope that we’re moving into an era where a woman will be recognized for being a tremendous athlete, as opposed to a tremendous female athlete.

OH: For me, stories like this simply reinforce my awareness that the ideas that women can’t do what men can or be as good as men at something are simply not true. I think that women have fallen into the trap/mindset that they have a predetermined path, one which doesn’t involve challenging the social norms or trying to do something that they have never done before, and stories like this heighten awareness that this is simply not the case. All women have the chance and opportunity to play in a men’s league, or even just challenge themselves by competing with a man for a job (something which many women think will never turn out in their favor).

FGN: What advice would you have for parents of girls around playing sports?

KM: It’s so important for parents to encourage girls to play sports at a young age—in the boys’ or the girls’ league. Sports teach bigger life lessons at an earlier age that they might not get elsewhere. Young kids can get real life experience in playing with boys and building their confidence and self-esteem that will help them tremendously as they become young women. Even if a girl wants to play football, parents should support and push their daughters to follow their passion. Parents shouldn’t limit a child’s interests even if they do go against what society views as appropriate for girls and boys.

Olivia Hulme

LW: Sports provide unparalleled learning experiences and instill a sense of pride and confidence, all of which I think is beneficial for any child. I can say without doubt or reservation, that I would not be the self-assured individual that I am today if I had not been allowed to pursue my passion for athletics.

OH: I would advise parents to not push their daughters to play/try out only “girly” sports but rather let them pursue whatever they are most interested in, whether that be ballet or football. The experience that children can gain from being in a diverse environment, such as with boys, is something that will help throughout their entire lives. I think that parents should be open-minded to the possibility of their daughter becoming involved in a ‘non-traditional’ competition or team, because in the long run, that will help them immensely.

FGN: Do you see athletics as having any political value for women seeking equality?

LW: I think that women must continue to work on ensuring that there are equal opportunities for girls and women in sports, but I also think that athletics can be a platform for promoting equality in society as a whole. The legendary Battle of the Sexes tennis match between Billie Jean King and Bobby Riggs legitimatized women’s athletic abilities, in addition to showing that woman can compete and succeed in a “man’s world.”

OH: I absolutely think that athletics is a powerful venue for women seeking equality. The ability to demonstrate equality in the sports arena can easily translate over to many other aspects of life, allowing women a strong platform on which to stand when they are challenged by men, or even other women, who do not agree with whatever political statement they are trying to make regarding equality for women in all aspects of life.

By Katie Culver

Here’s a Super Bowl quiz question: Would you send your daughter to a football game in her underwear?

I wouldn’t. And yet, funny thing is, there’s women at every NFL football game in a close approximation of panties and bras. They just happen to be on the sidelines cheering — so does that mean it’s okay?

As a mom (and a football fan) who is raising children to believe they can be in the game, or at least relate to it, I’m disturbed by the skimpy cheerleader dress (or undress):

• They are the most visible representation of women at the game. They are on the sidelines; they are cheering for an all-male team in the patriarchal sport of football.
• Girls watching the game gravitate to the cheerleaders (most teams also have a “junior” cheer squad to capitalize) and the message they get is that their involvement in this multi-billion dollar, socially pervasive sport is limited to cheering on the sidelines, wearing inappropriate clothing. The subtext: Don’t bother competing because only your body is worth the attention.
• Those at home get up-close views of these women before and after every commercial break, which reinforces women’s “place” at the game (never mind that the commercials we’ve just seen typically feature disturbing images of women behaving in stereotypically, demeaning ways).

The question about cheerleader dress in public might spur a comparison to the beach. Sure, people wear revealing attire to swim and it’s no big deal. The difference is that men and women alike are dressed to swim.

Then there’s quasi-feminist argument claiming that women who have beautiful bodies should be able to proudly display them. The problem? In a setting in which the men are not only fully-clothed, but extra clothed (with more undergarments than anyone else present) women are objectified, and the presence of cheerleaders—displaying this much of their bodies— just reinforces hegemonic notions of women’s status in society.

Why should my daughter think the only “place” for her on a football field is on the sidelines, nearly naked?

I am willing to budge: When TV cameras show fully-clothed female coaches, assistants, or trainers – I’ll reconsider. Until then, I’ll push for cover-ups for cheerleaders. In some cold weather venues, I bet they’ll snatch them right up.

1. Ignoring athletic development of girls. What’s wrong: Sports is the language of power and self-efficacy (a particularly urgent matter in places where females face violence and lack equal rights). Failure to encourage girls – whether in Texas or Bangladesh or on the preschool play lot – to learn the skills and rules join physical play puts them at a social, economic, and political disadvantage. What to do: Lace up (sneakers on little girls) and speak up for women’s access to athletics everywhere.
2. The financial devaluation of females in sport. What’s wrong: Whether it’s LPGA purses, coach salaries, promotional budgets, or college ticket prices, paying less just because it’s women (guys, I’m sick of the supply-and-demand arguments; it IS more loaded than that) is fundamentally wrong and detrimental to women. What to do: Women, open your wallets and get in the game; supporting talented female athletes is a political act!
3. Single-sex sports – especially in grade school. What’s wrong: Sorting athletes, particularly as children, by gender before skill or competitive level sends a message to little girls that somehow they shouldn’t – or can’t – play with the boys and enforces gender stereotypes, even outside of sports. What to do: Support co-ed athletic opportunities at all levels; if sports has the power to build international relations, why not gender relations?
4. “Lady”-name-the mascot. What’s wrong: Until we’re ready to put the label “gentlemen” before college mascots (say the Tennessee Gentlemen Volunteers, the Gentlemen Blue Devils?) modifying only the women’s team nicknames creates, enforces, and publicizes a second class status. What to do: Call both teams by the same mascot name and bet most fans will know the difference.
5. The pink-if-fication of sport equipment and wear – for females. What’s wrong: Nothing against the sprightly color pink, but the marketing belief that color-coding athletic goods in pink makes them “safe” and “appealing” to females is an affront to our sportiness (do we do this for boys?) and marks the vast non-pink sports universe as male. What to do: Push past the pink; spend your green on the real stuff.
6. Hot pants for playing. What’s wrong: Uniforms that are more about sex appeal than athletic zeal (and free movement) mark women’s sports as entertainment of the wrong sort. What to do: No one says you have to wear granny rags to work out or play, but respect yourself as an athlete. Who wants to slide into third wearing hot pants (and whose idea are shorts in softball anyhow?)?

1. A legitimately equal opportunity to develop athletic skills and play sports — from the start.

This means: girls should be handed a ball (instead of a doll or toy purse) as soon as they can hold something. They should be dressed appropriately so they can run, climb, jump as much as boys do. Girls should be taken to watch sporting events and have pictures of female athlete role models hanging on their walls. And girls should have as many options as boys to play sports as early as possible in their lives.

2.     Equal air time on major networks and ESPN for MY sporting events, such as prime time for Women’s college basketball and (can I add LESS time and money spent on #*&$@&^$ football?)

3. Hot male commentators at every televised game (and yes, we should wonder if they really know anything about the game as they interview coaches). They should also be dressed interestingly enough that we viewers can comment on their clothes and hair.

4.   Commercials that offend men during football games (is it possible?!) Men in speedos (and heels?) serving drinks to women in a bar or women picking up men with ridiculous lines using  actual film clips taken from top female coaches’ press conferences.

5.     A major stadium built primarily for women’s sports (with luxury boxes featuring top women-owned companies, actually clean bathrooms, and that sell jerseys of female athletes in XXL).

6. The cover of ESPN devoted to top female athletes (wearing clothes).

And while you’re at it, Santa, please bring all of those poor NFL cheerleaders some football-weather appropriate outerwear.

Girls playing handball in Bangladesh

By Laura Pappano

Sport is a tool for social, political and economic equality. In Bangladesh — where girls face routine physical violence, child marriage, and are denied the same access to education as boys — that couldn’t be more critical. Consider that the country’s Demographic and Health Survey showed that 36 percent of women believe that “wife beating is justified.” Clearly, the power of sport to build physical strength and self-worth among schoolgirls is about more than play. It’s about survival.

Promoting Human Rights and Education in Bangladesh (PHREB) does innovative work with schools to create sports opportunities for girls – something that PHREB executive director Faridul Alam told FairGameNews challenges rigid gender roles.

“People widely believe that girls do not need to achieve education,” Alam says in an e-mail. “In almost all schools in Bangladesh there is an annual sports competition where girls have a chance to play some traditional games such as kabadi. However, during the rest of the year, most schools do not have any organized sports events for girls. On the other hand, boys can play whatever sports they like, any time they like. Boys regularly play at school and community grounds, often on a daily basis.”

While most high schools are coed, he notes that “in these schools girls have no chance to play as it is considered shameful for girls to play.  There is also a shortage of female trainers, which also hampers girls’ access to sports.”

Carrie Gage, a volunteer from Australia working on the ground with schoolgirls through PHREB, helped FairGameNews hear from six girls aged 14 and 15 who gathered during a debate club meeting to collectively answer questions we submitted about what sports participation means to them. Here’s what the girls had to say:

FGN: Which sport do you play — or are you interested in playing?
Girls: At school, after our examinations, we play cricket. This is only for one day a year. At home, we play badminton with some of our friends and our brothers. We are interested to play football (soccer) but our guardians do not permit it. We would also like to play basketball.

FGN: How long have you played your sport?
Girls: For six years, we have played an annual cricket game that is organized by the school.

FGN: What have you learned about yourself by playing a sport?
Girls: By playing sport we have learned discipline, patience, and being physical.

FGN:  How are the opportunities for playing sports different for boys and girls your age? Are there some sports girls are not allowed to play?
Girls: It is easier for boys to play sports than girls because they are very strong and fit. It is difficult for girls to play sports like football because of the need to run around, which is hard with the clothes we wear (tunic, long pants and scarf).

FGN: What do your parents think about you playing a sport (or having the chance to play)?
Girls: Most of our parents have a negative attitude towards sports as they think that it creates a problem and controversy for girls to play sports. The more educated the parents are, the more positive or approving they are for us to play.

FGN: Do you ever watch sports on television — or in your community?
Girls: We watch men’s cricket and women and men’s tennis on TV. We do not really watch sport in the community because it’s mainly only boys that will play.

FGN: What is the best thing about playing a sport?
Girls: We like to practice sport as much as we can so that we become fit and strong and improve our skills.

FGN: Has playing a sport changed the way you think about your future?
Girls: Playing sport has allowed us to get exercise and we now know more about different sports and the benefits of playing sport. We also believe that it will be possible for us or other girls to play sport for our country and play internationally.

It bugs me. I drive by the fields in my town – and I only see men coaching the soccer teams.  Don’t get me wrong. It’s wonderful when dads share quality time with their daughters and sons. But where are the moms?

Even in the backyard, it’s dad shooting hoops and playing catch. How can we get moms outside to play?

Our daughters now have the opportunity to play a variety of sports, but we still have too few female role models to guide them.  Showing girls that they can be strong, active, and capable women starts at home, with mothers.

Dolly Ryan (photo), did play basketball in high school and college and now coordinates the 7th and 8th grade youth basketball program in her community. She’s working to creating a co-coaching model that includes at least one female and one male coach for each team. Ryan says she “hopes that through youth basketball more mothers will see they can contribute through youth sports.” Most coaches are dads, she says.

Having moms in coaching positions, says Ryan, brings a valuable balance to a program, helping to “reflect what town sports should be about, i.e. community, having fun, living a healthy lifestyle, challenging yourself, being respectful of refs and coaches – and representing the town in a positive light both on and off the court.”

Contrary to popular belief, you can coach even if you haven’t played the sport. And – truly – your participation matters.  Just in case you need the nudge, here are six reasons why it’s beneficial for your daughters to see you coach:

1.    Doing something together other than shopping at the mall is a fun and alternative way to bond.
2.    She will see you as a whole new person (not just the one upset by the messy room) including as a skilled sportsperson, something we value in our society.
3.    You will feel important and proud of yourself – particularly if it’s a new sport for you.  (Note: When you feel good, your daughter will notice!)
4.    You can share firsthand in your daughter’s accomplishments as an athlete, plus she’ll develop her own self-confidence by wanting to show off her skills!
5.    Learning about your daughter’s sport allows you to be an educated fan and cheerleader.  Dads need not have a monopoly on sports knowledge and when you can talk about the passing game or staying goal-side when defending, she’ll notice.  It will take you from mom role to mentor role.
6.    Mothers can make great mentors, especially when daughters pursue sports.  And the benefits can go both ways. Getting involved in your daughter’s sport may inspire you to ramp up your own activity level. It can be an opportunity to get back to something you love or to redefine yourself!

Emilie Liebhoff is a former co-captain of Dartmouth College women’s ice hockey, mother of two daughters, and founder of Moms as Mentors and the Director of Strategic Initiatives at the National Coalition of Girls’ Schools.